I’m sitting here trying to think about how to word what’s on my mind. Sometimes it’s harder to write down what you’re thinking versus just outright saying it. Hopefully it won’t be a rambling mess.
I haven’t written many blog posts this year related to the BDSM Lifestyle because I’ve been so concentrated on other outside things. I decided in January to try to get my out of control health problems in hand, by making a radical diet change as well as adding daily exercise to my life. In the beginning, it took every part of my mind, body, and soul to stay with the new course I set for myself. I was very lucky that Padrone was very supportive of my decisions, even though he didn’t join me at that time.
As the weeks went on, I was losing weight but also feeling much stronger, more energetic, and overall better. At the beginning of March, Padrone was rushed to the Emergency Room with multiple health issues. He ended up staying there for 8 days and was off work for another 2 weeks for recovery. He was forced to stop smoking cold turkey after 45 or more years of constantly lighting up. He had to start adding in exercise as well as change his own diet. Luckily for me, I had been doing this already for several weeks prior, so I was able to help him in making the right food choices and encouraging him to exercise.
Now, here we are 2 months later and both of us have been focused on improving our health and getting stronger. We are in a very unique but also extremely supportive situation, since we both had to change our lifestyle to being more active and choosing better food. We are able to sympathize with the other when one of us is craving something we can’t have now.
This leads me to our BDSM dynamic. I’ve received many messages over the years asking for advice because it seems like their dynamic fizzled out or went quasi-vanilla. What people don’t understand is that just like a normal vanilla relationship, BDSM relationships evolve and change along the way also, because people are always changing.
In our case, while we’ve always maintained our dynamic to a certain degree, in the past year, it had not been as intense as it had been in years past. Outside influences, such as work, mental and physical health, and basic everyday obligations, contributed to that. We actually didn’t even really notice the changes, because we were both not feeling as well as we should have been because of health issues.
Now that we’ve both lost weight, changed our eating habits, and become more active, I’ve noticed a change back to a more intense M/s dynamic, similar to what it was in the beginning of our relationship. Obviously, after 7 years together, we know almost everything about the other one. I don’t think either of us has anything new left to discover. So, even though the shiny new feeling has worn to a comfortable place now, that intense attraction to the other, mentally/physically/emotionally, has never gone away.
As we age, our bodies and minds prioritize things differently. We crave touch still, but it doesn’t consume our every waking thought like it may have 20 years ago. We focus more on the mental and emotional well being as well as the health of our partner. With time, we have been blessed with the fact that we’ve grown even closer together instead of more apart, like you see happen with many couples these days.
Now you see why I haven’t written a BDSM related blog post in a while. We’ve just had our concentration turned inwards towards improving ourselves. Now, that we are both on the right track, I am hoping to be more active in the online communities as well as blogging more.
So, if there are any topics that you can’t find in my blog history and want me to write about, please send me your suggestions!
I haven’t written many blog posts this year related to the BDSM Lifestyle because I’ve been so concentrated on other outside things. I decided in January to try to get my out of control health problems in hand, by making a radical diet change as well as adding daily exercise to my life. In the beginning, it took every part of my mind, body, and soul to stay with the new course I set for myself. I was very lucky that Padrone was very supportive of my decisions, even though he didn’t join me at that time.
As the weeks went on, I was losing weight but also feeling much stronger, more energetic, and overall better. At the beginning of March, Padrone was rushed to the Emergency Room with multiple health issues. He ended up staying there for 8 days and was off work for another 2 weeks for recovery. He was forced to stop smoking cold turkey after 45 or more years of constantly lighting up. He had to start adding in exercise as well as change his own diet. Luckily for me, I had been doing this already for several weeks prior, so I was able to help him in making the right food choices and encouraging him to exercise.
Now, here we are 2 months later and both of us have been focused on improving our health and getting stronger. We are in a very unique but also extremely supportive situation, since we both had to change our lifestyle to being more active and choosing better food. We are able to sympathize with the other when one of us is craving something we can’t have now.
This leads me to our BDSM dynamic. I’ve received many messages over the years asking for advice because it seems like their dynamic fizzled out or went quasi-vanilla. What people don’t understand is that just like a normal vanilla relationship, BDSM relationships evolve and change along the way also, because people are always changing.
In our case, while we’ve always maintained our dynamic to a certain degree, in the past year, it had not been as intense as it had been in years past. Outside influences, such as work, mental and physical health, and basic everyday obligations, contributed to that. We actually didn’t even really notice the changes, because we were both not feeling as well as we should have been because of health issues.
Now that we’ve both lost weight, changed our eating habits, and become more active, I’ve noticed a change back to a more intense M/s dynamic, similar to what it was in the beginning of our relationship. Obviously, after 7 years together, we know almost everything about the other one. I don’t think either of us has anything new left to discover. So, even though the shiny new feeling has worn to a comfortable place now, that intense attraction to the other, mentally/physically/emotionally, has never gone away.
As we age, our bodies and minds prioritize things differently. We crave touch still, but it doesn’t consume our every waking thought like it may have 20 years ago. We focus more on the mental and emotional well being as well as the health of our partner. With time, we have been blessed with the fact that we’ve grown even closer together instead of more apart, like you see happen with many couples these days.
Now you see why I haven’t written a BDSM related blog post in a while. We’ve just had our concentration turned inwards towards improving ourselves. Now, that we are both on the right track, I am hoping to be more active in the online communities as well as blogging more.
So, if there are any topics that you can’t find in my blog history and want me to write about, please send me your suggestions!
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I can't believe how fast 2016 has come and gone. So much has happened this year. If you keep up with world events, you know about all the wars and acts of terrorism that has plagued so many countries and innocents. The crazy political race in the USA, the rise of racism and the feeling that the world is devolving instead of evolving. To sum it up, this past year sucked.
I have been agonizing over how to write an inspirational post for year's end and have almost pulled all my hair out trying to come up with an upbeat topic or theme. I tried and failed. Finally, after discussing it in depth with my Padrone, he told me to write what I feel and just get it out there. So, that's exactly what I'm doing.
I found myself dealing with my own personal health issues more than normal. I couldn't concentrate like I wanted to on the world of BDSM, my writing, and the blog. I admit that a lot of the year I floated along, not really feeling or able to drudge up the intense feeling I always have had for the lifestyle. Instead, I was focused more on world events and my own family.
Padrone has been my rock and a constant source of support no matter how bad I felt or how far I veered from my own submissive path. He has loved and guided me through some dark times and been there for me for the beautiful ones. He helped me think through situations and answer questions I just didn't have answers for.
I have had the support of many friends, but one in particular has been that shoulder I leaned on and my sounding board when needed. Sharon has been my own personal cheerleader, even when I lost faith in my own abilities. Many of my articles this past year were inspired by conversations I had with her. I couldn't have ever asked for a better, unwavering friend than this special lady.
When I write posts, I feel like I have to try to make them BDSM related as well as educational. I always also try to write inspirational words to help people that may be struggling in life. But what happens when the one that writes the inspirational words has nothing to say? What do I do then? I ended up doing nothing. I didn't write. I went for weeks and even months staring at blank pages. For me, my writing is a source that people from around the world can read and connect to their own personal situation that they may be encountering at that time. It's something to help guide and inspire them to a different path.
In years past, the internet was always hopping with new people asking questions, interested in really learning about what the BDSM lifestyle could possibly offer them. There was a constant influx of new questions, curiosity seekers, fake and real dominant and submissives. You could go to any number of groups and find ongoing discussions of any number of various topics. This past year has dwindled to a trickle of people and so many pages and groups across all forms of social media have dried up. Now, it seems like people are mostly complaining about what they don't like or showing off what they have that others want but can't get. I miss serious Q&A where so many people participate.
I find myself thinking about what I can do to get back onto a learning path and get people interested once again in the educational side of BDSM versus the sex part. I decided to turn my focus from world events and simply live, love and work within the world that I am already inhabiting: BDSM. I can't control anything that's going on with wars or politics. I can't do anything about the refugee crisis. Heck, I can't even really do anything to make my epilepsy better. But I ask myself what can I do?
I can control what I watch and read about. I can control how I decide to live my life. I want to dive into 2017 with a new outlook. I want to start participating in more BDSM related groups and helping more newbies find their journey into the lifestyle. I want to concentrate on my own submission with my Padrone and share more of my daily experiences about our dynamic. I think I need to do this, not just want to.
This is where I would normally reinforce the main message that I'm trying to get across, but honestly, this time there really isn't one. I will encourage you to take the time to simplify your life as much as you can. Spend more time with your family and friends talking and just being connected. Don't try to take the world too seriously and don't allow all the bad things that's happening around the globe to poison your own life. Try everyday to be thankful for what you have and not dwell on what you don't. Get back to the basics of life and in most of my readers lives, basics of the BDSM lifestyle.
Try to be just a little nicer person and a little less cynical. Try to be happy. That's what life should be about. Happiness, love, friendships, and connections.
Make 2017 into whatever you decide you want it to be. Don't allow it to make you into something you're not.
From Padrone Marco and myself, have a healthy, happy and safe new year!
I have been agonizing over how to write an inspirational post for year's end and have almost pulled all my hair out trying to come up with an upbeat topic or theme. I tried and failed. Finally, after discussing it in depth with my Padrone, he told me to write what I feel and just get it out there. So, that's exactly what I'm doing.
I found myself dealing with my own personal health issues more than normal. I couldn't concentrate like I wanted to on the world of BDSM, my writing, and the blog. I admit that a lot of the year I floated along, not really feeling or able to drudge up the intense feeling I always have had for the lifestyle. Instead, I was focused more on world events and my own family.
Padrone has been my rock and a constant source of support no matter how bad I felt or how far I veered from my own submissive path. He has loved and guided me through some dark times and been there for me for the beautiful ones. He helped me think through situations and answer questions I just didn't have answers for.I have had the support of many friends, but one in particular has been that shoulder I leaned on and my sounding board when needed. Sharon has been my own personal cheerleader, even when I lost faith in my own abilities. Many of my articles this past year were inspired by conversations I had with her. I couldn't have ever asked for a better, unwavering friend than this special lady.
When I write posts, I feel like I have to try to make them BDSM related as well as educational. I always also try to write inspirational words to help people that may be struggling in life. But what happens when the one that writes the inspirational words has nothing to say? What do I do then? I ended up doing nothing. I didn't write. I went for weeks and even months staring at blank pages. For me, my writing is a source that people from around the world can read and connect to their own personal situation that they may be encountering at that time. It's something to help guide and inspire them to a different path.
In years past, the internet was always hopping with new people asking questions, interested in really learning about what the BDSM lifestyle could possibly offer them. There was a constant influx of new questions, curiosity seekers, fake and real dominant and submissives. You could go to any number of groups and find ongoing discussions of any number of various topics. This past year has dwindled to a trickle of people and so many pages and groups across all forms of social media have dried up. Now, it seems like people are mostly complaining about what they don't like or showing off what they have that others want but can't get. I miss serious Q&A where so many people participate.
I can control what I watch and read about. I can control how I decide to live my life. I want to dive into 2017 with a new outlook. I want to start participating in more BDSM related groups and helping more newbies find their journey into the lifestyle. I want to concentrate on my own submission with my Padrone and share more of my daily experiences about our dynamic. I think I need to do this, not just want to.
This is where I would normally reinforce the main message that I'm trying to get across, but honestly, this time there really isn't one. I will encourage you to take the time to simplify your life as much as you can. Spend more time with your family and friends talking and just being connected. Don't try to take the world too seriously and don't allow all the bad things that's happening around the globe to poison your own life. Try everyday to be thankful for what you have and not dwell on what you don't. Get back to the basics of life and in most of my readers lives, basics of the BDSM lifestyle.
Try to be just a little nicer person and a little less cynical. Try to be happy. That's what life should be about. Happiness, love, friendships, and connections.
Make 2017 into whatever you decide you want it to be. Don't allow it to make you into something you're not.
From Padrone Marco and myself, have a healthy, happy and safe new year!
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