BDSM Unveiled-Original BDSM lifestyle content-BDSM Relationships

Michelle Fegatofi

Many new people to the world of BDSM don't have the education and/or experience to tell the difference of what is considered 'normal' and what is abuse in the BDSM Lifestyle.

Here is a list of things to look out for that are obvious signs of an Abuser posing as a Dominant.

• Controlling behavior due to fear of losing their partner.
• Isolating the submissive from family and friends
• Discouraging self sufficient behavior
• Not allowing any social interaction which does not include the Dominant
• Out of control jealousy
• Explosive temper
• Behaves like a spoiled child when not getting his/her way
• Abuses drugs/alcohol
• Does not take responsibility for mistakes
• Uses unhealthy behavior to gain control over the submissive
• Emotional Blackmail - example: Keeping the submissive in a constant state of fear that the relationship will end if they don't get their way.
• Emotional Withdrawal - example: Using the "silent treatment" or physically withdrawing and cutting off all contact rather than communicating and taking responsibility for the situation.
• Withdrawal of affection
• Refusing any/all intimacy as a punishment which can be quite damaging and reinforces the fear that the submissive will lose the relationship unless he/she gives into this type of blackmail.

If your Dominant shows any of these signs on a consistent basis, please seek advice or help from experienced Dominants or subs to get an unbiased opinion of the situation.

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