While looking at many different BDSM submissive/slave profiles on various internet sites, the one thing that stood out over and over was the amount of people that refer to themselves as worthless.
I read deeper into them to try to see if there was more to it than just the normal self derision that most people think about themselves. But, shockingly, I found that a lot of people (men and women both) honestly think they are worthless and not worthy of being the dirt on the bottom of a shoe.
So, I pose this question to you, the ones that have this word WORTHLESS on your profiles and actually think this way, if you think you are so worthless, how do you even propose to say you are a BDSM submissive or slave? You see, in the world that I have inhabited for over 20 years off and on, no sub that meant anything to anyone, saw themselves as worthless. How can you expect to be the property of and make your Dominant proud, if you actually think you are worthless? You can't.
Yes, I know that many masochists are into humiliation, but this is a different mentality. I am not talking about being called the normal names that the harshist Sadists use on their subs. I mean the subs that actually see themselves as not worthy of being a sub or slave.
In the normal, vanilla world, worthless is a word that is widely used by bullies and abusers to mentally break down and torment their victim. I think many people that were abused in their early lives have brought that baggage into BDSM relationships and can't figure out why they keep getting uncollared or not ever being considered for a collar in the first place. That's because the majority of Dominants do not want a submissive that has that mental attitude.
Submission is a gift that when nurtured properly, can turn into the most wonderful and best lifestyle you can imagine. Learning your Dominant's likes and dislikes, rules and guidelines, protocols and rituals, all combine to make for a very interesting and wonderful journey, not only in becoming a better submissive, but also in learning the deeper inner part of yourself.
So, look at your profiles on the internet and if you do have the word WORTHLESS in it, please consider the actual meaning behind that word and think really hard if you want to portray that type of persona.
BDSM, Dominance/submission, S&M are all variables in this wonderful lifestyle we all are either learning about or actually living. There is no closer relationship that I know of than that of a Dominant and his/her submissive.
And that relationship is priceless...
Post title: " Words Do Matter in Submission! "by:
About The Author
Michelle has been in and around the BDSM Lifestyle for over 20 years as a submissive/slave. She mentors and advises new people, as well as writes educational books and blogs on different subjects from a submissive point of view.
She shares her own life experiences and incites in hopes of inspiring others.
Post title: " Words Do Matter in Submission! "
Posted by Michelle Fegatofi at 1/30/2013 12:42:00 AM January 30, 2013