April 21, 2017

Wax Play Basics

Wax play is a form of temperature play practiced in a BDSM context. The idea of wax play is to introduce a slight burning sensation to the skin. This is considered a moderately advanced form of play. If done wrong, wax play can cause burns severe enough to require medical attention. Keep in mind different body parts have a different tolerance towards wax.

BDSM Wax Play

This tolerance is highly personal and isn’t as obvious as you may think. I’ve seen subs beg for mercy from wax on their abs and the same sub beg for more from wax on their balls. There are some really nasty nooks and crannies on the body for wax but self-preservation prevents me from telling where they are.

Wax cools and solidifies on the body, more wax needs longer to cool, so it burns longer and skin is longer exposed to heat. Be aware of that before filling up the bellybutton in one go. Also, beware of splattering. And this should go without saying, but never drip candle wax on the face. Splattering in the eyes can blind. And also never pour hot candle wax inside a bodily orifice. Keeping it to the outside is fine.

Types of Wax

Types of Wax


  1. Scented candles are paraffin wax mixed with oil and burn at 120 F. These are the typical kind you’ll find in retail stores.
  2.  Pure paraffin wax candles burn at about 135 F. Most unscented white candles are this.
  3. Beeswax candles burn at 145 F. These are the kind sold as tea candles or storm candles, where the point is to be a bright light source for a long time. Some beeswax candles mixed with stearin can burn at 170 F and up. These would be marketed as industrial strength long-lasting, bright lighting candles.
  4. Soy wax candles are the safest of the above for a number of reasons. The melting temperature is, typically, between 135 and 145 F, but cools quickly on contact and makes for a much easier clean up than paraffin. A major benefit over paraffin is that it is not carcinogenic as soy wax is produced using soy beans. It is also less likely to cause skin irritation.

Preparing for Play


  1. A thin film of mineral oil or even baby oil on any skin to be waxed makes removal much easier and can be a fun erotic piece of the scene in itself.
  2. Spread an old sheet or tarp over the play area, to protect your carpet or furniture
  3. Bring a flat hard surface near to the play area to hold your candles, wax pots and other toys securely – this helps avoid spills (unwanted spills) and prevents accidents, like tipped-over candles, etc.
  4. Put a romantic or edgy CD on continuous loop, so that you don’t have to stop the scene to put in another piece of music. Once you are fully engaged with your partner in the erotic wax play scene, stopping abruptly can cause major ‘sub drop’! (Sub drop is also known as submissive drop and can be extremely upsetting, emotionally).
  5. Gather all your scene stuff before beginning play – wet washcloths or towels for instant cooling of wax, ice in a bowl, a mini-fire extinguisher you can purchase from any auto parts store, and anything else you can think of to keep your submissive and your home safe.


Wax removal can be tedious but stretching/compressing the skin a bit will loosen the wax blobs significantly. Wax and hair make for pain play you might not have planned: body hair can be somewhat protected from wax, and cleanup made easier, by coating the hairs with baby oil or mineral oil before wax play begins.

Precautions when using wax

Precautions:


  1. People vary tremendously in pain tolerance when it comes to temperature play. One person will barely feel it, while another one finds it unbearably excruciating. There’s no way to tell ahead of time.
  2. Body areas will also vary widely by pain sensitivity. A drop on your arm feels cooler than a drop on your butt, and so on.
  3. Some people are flat out allergic to most of the additives in candles. Typically if a person has an allergic reaction to perfumes or tree nuts, they should skip the candles too.
  4. No matter how much a subject may enjoy this, be advised that some people scar from wax play, especially with a hotter candle such as beeswax.
  5. Some skin conditions make people more prone to scar from candles or lose some skin when the wax is removed. These range from recent sunburn to eczema.
  6. Some medications make people more sensitives to candle wax. These include blood-pressure medication and steroids, among other.


Just do your research and take every precaution possible before engaging in any type of advanced play.


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