BDSM Unveiled Talk Tuesday 28 October 2014

Hello and happy Tuesday everyone! It's time again for Talk Tuesday!

I've picked two very interesting questions once again that I think will help further your own journeys into the BDSM Lifestyle.

Question #1) "How long after beginning a dialogue with someone on line (dating sites or Facebook) should you meet in person? I have had a few online inquiries who want to meet but I am always reluctant because most do not use their own name nor when asked do they provide much information about themselves. They also do not ask questions of me that make me feel that they want to get to know me. In fact, I feel hat they only want to meet to judge sexual attraction. What do you think?"

I believe in safety first. If you meet someone online, you should get to know the real them before meeting them in person. If someone refuses to show you a picture of their real face or tell you their real name, there is probably much more they are hiding. I'm not saying everyone is like that, but if someone likes you enough online that they want to meet in person, there should be no problem with telling you their real name, phone number, and the type of car they drive.

As far as time, it all depends on individual people. If you meet someone and you just connect, you know some of the same online people that can verify the character and real identity of the person, then maybe all you need is a month. For others, they are much slower and more cautious and meet years after first speaking online together.

Above all, follow you instincts. Make sure if you have any reservations at all, that you don't meet the person before you are comfortable. Always make sure you leave the meeting place, person's name and telephone number, and any other relevant information with a friend just in case.

Here are some links for more information on this subject:

First Meetings: Cyber to Real Life
Predators are Everywhere: Beware
A Tale of Caution for Cyber BDSM

Question #2) "OK I'm a male and in the bedroom I'm a sub and my partner is my mistress/wife. We like strap-on play gags whips ect. But biggest thing we like to do is I wear lingerie like bra, panties, stockings, garter but thats all no makeup, heels or anything further than that. But I guess the kicker is that I wear women's panties outside the bedroom 24/7 I love them they are more comfortable than boxers I won't ever go back. Anyways wearing panties outside the bedroom do I have a different sexual status I guess it would be called straight/bisexual ect. I'm a straight man though I do like receiving anal play from a form of strap-on tried reading up on it can't find anything on it, other than men wearing panties is becoming more popular."

You would probably amazed at how many straight men I have met or heard from with similar situations. They have no sexual interest in other men, have no interest in cross dressing or wanting to becomes a transgender. They are confused as to why they like having a strap-on used by a female to receive anal play. They dress in women's lingerie for they pleasure it brings them to follow the requests of their female partners. And many of them love the humiliation that can come from that. What they don't know is that they are male submissives and some are also masochists. I think in the bedroom you are a masochistic submissive.

Although it is definitely a different path from what society considers 'normal', don't stress about it. If you and your partner are comfortable and happy, then keep doing what you're doing.

Helpful links for more information:

Men wearing Women's Underwear Fetish
Underwear Fetishism

Remember that you can send me your questions anytime by emailing me at bdsmunveiled@gmail.com! Come back next Tuesday for another round of BDSM Unveiled Talk Tuesday!