If you don't already know, bondage is the activity of restraining people for mutual erotic pleasure-tying someone up, locking them in chains, cuffs or collars, or using more esoteric forms of restraint--it's fun, can be incredibly hot and is a huge turn-on for a lot of people.
Per one well known source,
the Kinsey Institute, 12% of females and 22% of males respond erotically to
S&M. Studies vary, but another one (Lowe, 1983) had it that 5-10% of the U.S. engages in
SM for sexual pleasure on at least an occasional basis. It also said that 11% of men and 17% of women reported at least trying
bondage, so it follows that these people thought it might be a turn on. It is nothing new, but seems to be growing.
Just look at the massive (and growing) amount of bondage-related images in pop culture these days--movies, TV and music videos--and you can see that people are awakening to this side of sexuality. If you ever found yourself watching a movie with slightly more than causal interest when the girl or guy was tied up or had a collar locked around their neck or was locked in a prison cell, then you probably know a bit about this already.
Bondage as a sexual activity first came to notice in Japan in the late
Edo period. Generally recognized as "father of
Kinbaku" is
Seiu Ito, who started studying and researching
Hojōjutsu is credited with the inception of Kinbaku, though it is noted that he drew inspiration from other art forms of the time including Kabuki theatre and Ukiyoe woodblock prints. Kinbaku became widely popular in Japan in the 1950s through magazines such as Kitan Club and Yomikiri Romance, which published the first naked bondage photographs. In the 1960s, people such as Eikichi Osada began to appear performing live SM shows often including a large amount of
rope bondage, today these performers are often referred to as Nawashi (rope master) or Bakushi (from kinbakushi, meaning bondage master).
The
ropes used come in a variety of materials and length. Japanese bondage traditionally uses natural fibers such as hemp and jute which are cut to approximately 25 foot lengths. American-style bondage typically uses longer ropes that span a wider variety of materials.
An important part of rope bondage is the rope dress, which is not of itself a form of restraint, but may be used either by itself as an adornment, or as a basis for
restraining bondage.
There are two main names used in the BDSM community today for rope bondage - Kinbaku and
Shibari. There is much discussion about the distinction between shibari and kinbaku, and whether one term is more appropriate than another. One modern distinction which is gaining popularity is that shibari refers to purely artistic, aesthetic rope, whilst kinbaku refers to the artistic, connective, sensual, sexual practice as a whole.
A traditional view is that the term 'shibari' is a wrong Western Japonism. The word denotes
tying in Japanese, but in a generic way, and traditionally not in the context of bondage. The names for many particular
ties include 'shibari', but it is not traditional to call the entire activity that way. Instead, Kinbaku is the term for artistic or erotic tying within traditional Japanese rope bondage circles.
However, this is a somewhat hidebound definition and the word shibari is now increasingly being re-imported from the West to Japan, as the tying communities are very much interconnected. Most Japanese kinbakushi do not object to the term shibari, as it's common vernacular in the global community.
Kinbaku Technique
Kinbaku means '
tight binding'. Kinbaku is a Japanese style of bondage or BDSM which involves tying up the bottom using simple, yet visually intricate patterns, usually with several pieces of thin rope. The allusion is to the use of hemp rope for
restraining prisoners, as a symbol of
power, in the same way that stocks or manacles are used in a Western BDSM context.
Traditional Kinbaku is based on fairly specific rope patterns, most of them derived from Hojojutsu ties. Of particular importance are the
Ushiro Takatekote (a type of arm
box tie), which forms the basis of most Kinbaku ties, and the Ebi, or "Shrimp", which was originally designed as a torture tie but today makes the bottom vulnerable for more pleasant forms of play.
For historic reasons, Kinbaku uses very few knots, sometimes none at all, or only a
cow hitch or an
overhand knot. This requires rope with high friction. According to Sensei Nawa Yumio in his 1964 classic book on Torinawa, knots on a person was regarded as extremely disgraceful, something some would regard as worse than death. Restraints with no knots were not considered "bondage" and there was no shame in such; therefore, "
wrappings" were used.
A Feeling of Wonder
So what does it actually feel like to be
tied in a technique that’s so infused in history, secrecy, sensuality and mysticism? The tension in the
rope, controlled entirely by the rigger, becomes a link between the two of you, so being tied feels like an all-over embrace. As the
cords tighten around you the rope artist actually employs Shiatsu techniques (a type of Japanese massage) on specific pressure points. The roughness of the natural fibers in hemp or jute rope gives you goose-bumps as it slowly trails across your skin.
You fall into a trance-like state of deep relaxation and euphoria known as ‘rope space’, which for me feels similar to ‘sub space’ but without the sexual charge. Flooded with endorphins, your muscles relax and your speech slurs, if you can speak at all. You
submit yourself entirely to the ecstasy of being
bound. And all that, just from a piece of rope in the right hands - usually without any sexual touching at all.
Safety Considerations
There are several safety issues to consider when playing bondage games, concerning consent, abuse, and physical injuries. If you don't feel safe with something then don't do it, there are hundreds of other things you can do instead.
This
is NOT something to try with someone you've just met. You really don't
know whether they are trustworthy or not until you know them better,
however charming they may seem at first.
- Never let a partner
coerce or bully you into any sexual practice that you don't want to do.
It's perfectly OK to say no, a decent lover will understand.
- Talk
about it beforehand and discuss what you plan to do. Say what you will
or will not allow. These rules and limits are sacred and must not be
broken during the game.
- Have a safe word agreed before you
begin. This is something that the passive partner can say if they want
the other person to stop, a common safe word is 'enough'. The active
partner must then stop what they are doing immediately, and release the
passive partner within seconds.
- Never tie something around
someone's neck unless it is a collar that's specially made for the
purpose. There is a high risk of tissue damage, choking, or fatal
strangulation. Similarly, gags are potentially dangerous.
- If
someone is tied up, they must never be left alone. The active partner
must make sure they are comfortable, breathing properly, and that
nothing is cutting off their circulation.
- Do not try bondage in
a remote place, just in case there is an accident that leaves the
active partner injured and the passive partner tied up with no way of
getting help.
- If you've never tried bondage before, don't go
straight into anything that uses complicated equipment. This is for
experts only and has extra safety issues that you may not understand.
- The
rules of safer sex still apply. Use condoms for penetrative sex. Drink
and drugs can cause you to seriously underestimate safety risks. Avoid
intoxication.
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